Don't Let Them Change You

Don’t let them change you.  Unless it’s for the better.

We so easily let others define who we are, and who we will be.  We let their words pour out of our hearts when we look at ourselves in the mirror.  We let them dictate our choices and our weaknesses; forgetting where our strengths lie.

We let them change us.

We let them choose the paths we will go on in life. 

We so easily believe what is laid upon us, by others. We believe that we are weak. That we are ugly. We believe we aren’t talented and we believe that we are never going to get better. 

We let others control us. And sometimes they aren’t even in our lives anymore. But their words ring on and on and on…. And they live inside of us as if they were standing right in front of us.

We weaken ourselves to the point where we can’t handle any kind of stress, tragedy, or curveball that will happen in our lives. 

We become fragile.

All because we let them win. We let them change us.

I’m here to tell you, you are made of MORE. 

You can start again. 

You can change YOURSELF.  

You can become stronger.

Start with one thing. Then add another and another until you leave that path they had you on, and you step onto the path YOU choose.  

YOU change YOU.

YOU take control.

Don’t let them change you. Don’t let them hurt you anymore.

Letting Cobwebs Gather

I hate it when I go around dusting my home, and see corners where cobwebs have sneakily gathered. Sometimes it’s up high in a corner; sometimes on a tucked away window ledge.

It makes me feel like I’ve neglected my house making duties. Like, I have been “slacking.” 

Maybe I have. Or maybe I just don’t always pay attention to the things that aren’t right in my line of eyesight. I mean, how often do we go about our lives in our homes, and forget to look up. Or forget to look behind something? 

That’s why the cobwebs gather.

The same is true of our lives. A lot of times we tend to the things we see right in front of us. We think everything is clean, and superficially, it is. But we forget to look in the corners and nooks tucked out of our line of vision. We forget to look behind, to what hasn’t been taken care of. Those areas of our lives that are gathering cobwebs.

Maybe it’s an area of bitterness that we haven’t dealt with because it’s not currently bothering us. Maybe it’s the loss of something that we’ve failed to grieve, or a hurt that we’ve set up on a shelf.  Sometimes those things that are gaining cobwebs in our lives are the very things that are keeping us from feeling whole. We wander around wondering what is missing, and why we can’t move forward. 

It’s because there are cobwebs that are taking up residence in our lives. 

Just as in a home – every area of our heart and soul needs to be dusted off and cleaned. We can’t expect things to heal themselves. We can hope for everything to feel “good as new” but it won’t. Not without some attention from us.

Is it time that you got out that dust rag or feather duster, and cleaned off some corners of your heart? 

Do you need to look at some things that you’ve buried deep inside – things that have grown cobwebs?  

We think things stay back in the past when we move on with life but they don’t. They come with us. They reside IN us.

In order to be whole – we need to pay attention to every area of our lives. We need to deal with the “junk” even though (just like dusting) it’s not fun.  Once we do? Everything will feel better. We will feel cleaner.

And, we’ll wonder how we ever could have let that spot get so neglected.

In the "Wait"

The waiting can be excruciating.  You wake up each morning with that sinking feeling that today will be another day that goes by, without your answer.

For me - it was waiting for my insurance to approve my appeal so that I could have jaw surgery. A surgery that would entail a tough recovery.

It would be hard enough to actually GO THROUGH it all. But the wait? The waiting just made the tough process seem all that much longer. All that much harder.

I was sitting in the bathroom one morning, when God spoke to my heart. As I was thinking, “How long will I wait….?”  He spoke to me about my feelings. I was enlightened to how He must have felt each morning He awoke, knowing the day of His crucifixion was all that much closer. How must He have felt…. Knowing each day brought Him closer to that?

Was MY wait that hard?

And Queen Esther. How must she have felt each morning she awoke, wondering how she was going to approach her King.. her HUSBAND… about the impending death of her people? HER impending death?

When did Job wonder how much more he would have to go through? Each day he awoke, did he feel discouraged? Did he wonder how much more he would have to endure?

The wait.

We all have it. We all have to go through it.

Those of you who wake up each day, waiting for an organ transplant.

Those of you who wake up, hoping this will be the day a child is granted to be your FOREVER child.

Not one “wait” is easier or harder than another…. To those who are going through it. 

But it’s there so that God can open our eyes. So that we can SEE. So that things will be revealed to that raw, tender part of our heart that is suddenly so open. So willing to hear something GOOD, or something that we can relate to.

My wait was hard for me. But God met me there. And He will meet you in the middle of your “wait” too.

And that experience? Will always be something we hold close to our heart. Because through it, we grew. We felt.

We SAW.

Love Is.....

There used to be a cartoon strip that my husband and I would see in the Sunday paper from time to time. It was entitled, “Love is….” Then it would show a guy and a girl and it would have various themes each week of what “Love is.”  I remember hanging one or two of them on my fridge, and in fact, my husband and I would use that phrase occasionally when one or the other of us, did something loving for the other.

I still go to that phrase in my head and my heart.  For “love IS…” so much more than we often think of. And so much less. 

It’s the little things.

Love is….. when my husband walked back and forth our back yard with me, when I was healing from jaw surgery - because I was too tired to walk our street.

Love is…. When instead of playing the music I prefer at bedtime, I play my husband’s music of choice…… 70’s.

Love is…. When my son-in-law runs an extra errand even though he’s tired from work, to help out an “also-tired-from-work” daughter.

It’s turning on the heated seat in the car for your spouse before they get in from the cold.

It’s letting their messes around the house go, for a day, or a week, because you know they’ve had a busy or tough time of it.

Love is not complaining. Eating the not-so-greatly-cooked dinner. It’s not expecting a ‘thank-you.’

Love is taking your hard-working husband a cold drink, when they are out taking care of the yard.

It’s wiping up the kitchen, or sweeping the floor for your wife.

Love is SO much. And it’s also so little. 

It’s in the details of our day-to-day life. It’s in the laying down of our wishes, our pride, and our agenda.

Love IS.