Because I Love You Enough

Sometimes I don’t want to be a warrior. I don’t want to be “tough”.  I don’t want to be better or stronger than what I was before a challenge or hurdle in life.

Oh, I’m always thankful once I’m on the other side of a hurt. I’m thankful for what I learn through tough times. But I sure don’t feel that way when I’m walking INTO them.

I want to run. I want to hide.

It can be so easy to look out at everyone else and feel like their lives are beautiful. We can see the smiles, the dreams that come true, and the blessings that come their way…. And we can feel like they live charmed lives.

When all we feel like is “hope deferred” is our theme.

Yes? C’mon. You have the moments. I have those moments.

We wander through the muck, and we wonder, “Why, US, Lord”?

I can try to fight against the storm that I feel rages against me - but it’s always more powerful.

That’s because without those times, I wouldn’t lean on my God. I wouldn’t run to Him. I wouldn’t SEE how HE sees when all is said and done. I wouldn’t have a glimpse of His tenderness. I wouldn’t peek in on His strength, His goodness, or His vision.

I would only see mine. And mine can be so selfish. So limiting.

It doesn’t matter what we go through, or where we’ve been. It doesn’t matter how far we try to run. God will find us. He will pull us out of the shadows, and push us through the storm - the weeds - the desert (or whatever it seems to be for you.)

Because He has a bigger agenda in mind. 

Because He wants us to see ourselves as the warriors we fear we are not.

He wants us to feel the tears, the pride, and the gratefulness that come with “hope realized”.

So, when we call out and question why He picked on us, let us be still long enough to hear His reply…. “Because I love you enough to do what is best for you in the long run. I love you enough to to give you what you NEED, and not what you WANT. Because I love you enough, to make you better, stronger, softer, and wiser.

Because, I love you … ENOUGH”.