It's Not WHAT You Do, It's HOW You Do It

“Actions speak louder than words.” Such a true statement.

We are so good at saying things to one another.  “I love you.”  “I’ll pray for you.” “I’m so thankful for you.” Sometimes we back up these words with actions. Little thank you notes, small gifts, time spent with each other.

It can be easier to pay attention to these types of actions.

What about other actions in our lives that say a lot about who we are, and how we respect, or feel about other people?

What about having arrogance when we speak to others, instead of using humility?

What about, not being a good listener when someone tries to speak objectively into our life?

What about, not returning things you borrowed?

What about, being continually late to a meeting, lunch date, or some other event, where you make the other (s) wait for you?

How about never meeting someone half way in a friendship or relationship?

There are so many more “what about’s” and “how about’s” that could be listed.

It’s not just what you say, it’s not just what you do – it’s how you do it.

I can say something in truth to my child in gentleness and love. OR, I can say it in anger.

I can give money when asked, grumbling about it the whole time – or I can reach into my wallet before I’m even asked.

Our true heart lies in our actions. Whether we conduct ourselves with integrity, kindness, gentleness, and humility….. or whether we act indignant, selfish, and use “pointed” words. It says a lot.

I’ve heard people say, “I’ve said the same things as you, but no one listened.” Well, my question would be – “How was your delivery?” “How was your timing?” And most importantly, “Where was your heart and motivation during that moment the words were expressed?’

Our hearts don’t lie. And people can see through our words. They often know if we are putting them off, trying to get something out of them, or offering false ‘niceties.’

People aren’t stupid. (Even though we try to pretend they are.)

I can have something very good happen in my life, but how I present it to others, can either bring them into my goodness and encourage camaraderie, or it can alienate them altogether. Simply by how I deliver and enter into, what I perceive to be a good thing.

We aren’t running life alone. We run it with others.  And although those others don’t run every race with us, they certainly can be our sending team.  I’d rather have a sending team than a “shut the door on my life” team, because of how I arrogantly handled something.

It’s not just WHAT you do in life. It’s not just WHAT you say. It’s not just WHAT happens to you. It’s HOW you do it. HOW you say it.
And HOW you handle it.

Think before you act. Think before you speak.  For the loss of relationships can be so costly.