What If This Is It?

I was discouraged one day. I mean, we’ve all been discouraged right? On this particular day, I was discouraged about a certain dream of mine – a dream that just wasn’t coming to fruition for me and I’m not sure why.  What I AM sure of, is that I was frustrated, feeling “down” on myself and my abilities, and just plain feeling like a loser.

I have never questioned God. But I have asked him “Why” on many times and this was one of those occasions. I felt like God was being silent with me and that hurt.

I talked to Him and I cried out to Him. I told Him I would not lose heart even though at that moment, I felt like I had.

It wasn’t until a few hours after my conversation with God that He prompted my heart about something. “What if this is it?” What if my dream never happened? What if I never was “great” in my own mind – only “good?” How would I handle that? Would it be good enough for me or would I never be satisfied in my life… never content?

Those are very loaded questions, to which I’m not sure I have the perfect answers to.

I do know this. Ever since we are children, we are told that we can be anything. A lot of us are told how special we are and built up to do great things. But what if we don’t? What if we can’t? Do we feel “less than?”

I think God wanted me to truly ponder these questions that particular day. I think he wanted me to realize that sometimes His dream and my dream don’t always line up. But it doesn’t mean that He doesn’t think I’m “great” or “really special.”

I don’t know where you are in life or if you are struggling with wanting more for yourself.  If you are anything like me, I’m sure you have many dreams and wishes unfulfilled in your life. I think dreams are great. But for the first time in my life, I think sometimes they can also be harmful if they cause us to feel uncontented with where God currently has us in life. Because what if that is “it?” What if that is THE destination where He wants us? Can you handle that? Can I?

It’s up to each one of us to look within our hearts and search for peace and acceptance. We can be “great” no matter where we are. It’s all a matter of attitude and choice.  It doesn’t mean you have to give up on your dreams, merely be “content in all things.” That way if the ultimate prize that you have in your head DOES happen…..the blessing will only be felt deeper – for you – and – for me.